Authors By the Bay - Libby CataldiSunday, November 1, 2009 09:43:14 AMFor every drug addict there are at least four people affected, a depressing assertion by some experts that is clearly borne out in this soft-spoken, utterly honest account by educator Cataldi.”
~ Publisher’s Weekly
“As Virgil toured Dante through hell, so Libby Cataldi can hold your hand through a parent’s ultimate nightmare. A gripping story of a bad time for a good person, and how she conquered it.”
~ Tom Clancy
STAY CLOSE:
A Mother’s Story of Her Son’s Addiction
 Addiction does not discriminate. It poisons the most educated, accomplished and loving families – just ask Libby Cataldi. Cataldi holds a doctorate in education and was, for seventeen years, head of The Calverton School in Maryland, where her two sons, Jeff and Jeremy, attended. While she was guiding and disciplining other parents’ kids and putting in long days at this private school, Jeff was becoming a drug addict. How could this happen? He made good grades and played sports and even went on to Boston University – all the while a functional addict. Gradually, Jeff’s drug use, which started when he was in his early teens, turned dangerously to heroin, an addiction that often results in death.
Dr. Cataldi will speak about her book at the Calvert Library Prince Frederick on Sunday, November 22, at 2:00 p.m., as part of the Authors by the Bay series, presented by the Calvert Library Foundation. This event is a fundraiser for the Library Foundation. Light refreshments are included. Tickets are $20 for adults and $10 for students. Tickets are available in advance at any Calvert Library location.
In her harrowing and moving memoir, Stay Close: a Mother’s Story of her Son’s Addiction, Libby Cataldi reveals what a child’s drug addiction is like from a mother’s point of view and honestly examines what her family did wrong, how they abetted Jeff’s addiction when they didn’t mean to, how their family was torn apart and how it is now, finally, mending.
She draws on the journals she kept for many years, where she chronicled her family’s hell and sought to come to grips with her own role in it. She writes of the “crystal blue, good to be alive days” when Jeff was clean, and of the phone calls that came in the middle of the night or in the midst of preparing the Christmas meal that shocked her back to the reality that Jeff was using again. She takes us along as she researches various rehab centers (most of them only 30 days long – not nearly long enough, she explains), various therapies and strategies for handling an addict. It is when she goes to Italy, her family’s native country, for a much-needed rest that she learns the message of Stagli Vicino – or Stay Close. This, writes Cataldi, means to love with detachment (and to be constant in that love, even when someone is at their most unlovable), to offer verbal support and encouragement – but not money, allowing an addict to recover – something he must do for himself. Jeff has now been sober for over two years.
Stay Close is also, at times, an addict’s account of that downward spiral. Jeff contributes his own point-of-view and details what was really going on, which is often quite different from what his parents think. In addition, Jeff’s doctor, Patrick MacAfee, who has been working with addicts for forty years, provides an Afterword.
“This book is an effort to bring addiction out of the shadows and into a place of healing,” writes Cataldi in conclusion. She knows the shame associated with addiction and she knows how much courage it takes to heal – and to speak out. Stay Close is must-reading for families in crisis and for all those who want to better understand addiction, how to fight it and how to live again. Meet Dr. Cataldi at the Calvert Library on Sunday, November 22 at 2:00 p.m. For more information call 410-535-0291.
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